Wedding is very important to Vietnamese, not only to the couple involved, but also for both families. Thus, it is usually including quite a few formal ritual observances. The Wedding day is usually chosen well in advance by the groom and the bride's parents (in the old time, it is not necessarily Saturday or Sunday, as well as they believe it is good based on the groom and the bride's age).
On the wedding day, the groom's family and relatives go to the bride's house bringing a lot of gifts wrapped in red papers. These gifts are similar to those of the engagement: betel leaves and areca nuts, wines, fruits, cakes, tea ... Those who hold these trays are also carefully chosen; usually they are happily married couples. Ladies and women are all dressed in Ao Dai. Men could be in their suits or men traditional Ao Dai. The troop is usually led by a couple that is most wealthy and successful among the relatives, this means to wish the to-be-wed couples a blessing life together in the future.
The groom's family would stop in the font of the bride's house. The leading couple should enter the house first bringing a tray with wine and tiny cups on it. They would invite the bride's parents to take a sip. By accepting the toast, the bride's family agrees for the groom family to enter their house. The firework is immediately fired to greet the groom's family.
The groom's family would introduce themselves and ask permission for their son to marry his bride. The Master of the Ceremony (usually a respected person among the bride's relatives) instructs the bride's parents to present their daughter. The bride then follows her parents out. She is in Vietnamese traditional wedding Ao Dai which are usually in red. Followed are her bride maids. The wedding ceremony starts in front of the altar. The bride and the groom would kneel down and pray, asking their ancestors' permission to be married, also asking for blessing on their family-to-be. The couple then turns around and bow down to the bride's parents to say thank for raising and protecting her since birth. They then bow their head to each other, which means to show their gratitude and respect toward their soon-to-be husband or wife. The Master of the Ceremony would gave the wedding couple advices on starting a new family. The groom and the bride's parents would take turn to share their experience and give blessing. The groom and the bride then exchange their wedding rings. The parents will give the newly wedded value gifts such as golden bracelets, ear rings, necklace... The ceremony is ended with a round applause.
Today, a lot of Vietnamese couples have their wedding ceremony done in Temples or Churches which is very much similar to American and Western style, including exchanging vows and wedding rings. However, they still maintain Vietnamese traditional ceremony in the bride's home before heading to temples or churches.
A wedding banquet is scheduled in the evening at a hotel or a big restaurant. It is always a delight feast that all relatives, friends, and neighbors are invited. A music band is usually hired to play live songs.
At the banquet, the groom, bride, and their family are once again introduced to the guests and everyone will drink a toast. Dinner will be served at the tables.
During the reception, the groom, bride, and their parents will stop by each table to say thank to their guests. The guest in return, will give envelopes containing wedding cards and money gifts to the newly wedded couples along with their blessing. A lot of weddings nowadays are followed by a dancing party, which is opened by the groom and the bride's first dance. The party does not recess until very late at night. The newly wedded couples then leave for their honey moon.
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THE PERFECT VIETNAMESE WEDDING ONE CAN HAVE!
The most important celebration in a person's life is his or her wedding. How is this celebration different from one country to another? The Vietnamese and Chinese have almost the same way of celebrating weddings. Weddings in Vietnam have their own traditions and beauty. How are weddings celebrated in Vietnam?
In different countries, there are different ways of thinking. In wedding traditions such as Vietnamese and Chinese, there are some things that we call “restrictions" what to do are what not to do. The groom and the bride have so many things to observe and do; of course, today theses are thought of as “superstition". The couple who will be married can't see each other the day before their wedding. Superstition or not, seeing other can bring bad luck and sometimes it breaks up the couple, so most families observe this tradition. But these days however some choose not to observe it.
During the night before, the bride's mom will comb her daughter’s hair. Every comb means something. The most important meaning in that comb legacy is the third comb; she will ask that this third comb “Will bring her Luck and Happiness in your new home. The groom also has a really important situation when he has to answer difficult questions. The bride's friends ask him the groom some questions which is embarrassing and make him do some difficult physical challenges. After that, the couple is ready for the celebration.
What do American wedding dresses look like? The dresses are white. In culture such as Vietnam and Chinese, white is almost always for mourning. So, there is a different way of dressing. Vietnamese and Chinese cultures have their own dress which is called "Ao Dai Long Phung". Like here, there are many colors but the most appropriate color is red because it is the color for passion and Love. We have changed a lot, so some Vietnamese's brides dress like American, but at night, they wear Ao Dai for the banquet. In the past, the bride had to stay in her room waiting for the groom. But, now, she goes out with the groom and enjoys talking with her friends. Like the bride, the groom is dressed in black Ao Dai with a big red flower which differentiates the groom from the rest.
There is a part of tradition that can't be forgotten. The groom must show the bride to his parent. She, the bride, gives a cup of tea to her parents in law. After all that, there is the banquet. The guests begin to play tricks on the couple. Some of them are to see, how well they know each other. The purpose is to have fun without hurting each other. They tie an apple and ask the couple to eat it without using their hands. As you will see, most of the time they ended up kissing each other.
Beyond all that tradition, there is one thing in common everywhere: the Foods. There are at least twenty dishes at Vietnamese wedding such as fish and egg rolls. Each egg rolls are made of a third vegetable and two third of meat, depending on what you like. The egg rolls should come in pairs because they are like the couple; they should be in pair, always together. There is more kind of food. Then the bride and the groom have time to enjoy themselves. The wedding continues with dancing and celebrating.
Weddings are the most memorable and unforgettable celebrations of your life. The past can be forgotten, but not in a Vietnamese wedding. As a wedding is once a lifetime celebration, you should celebrate it with your own traditions and culture.
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